Workplace Friendships?

Friends at work. Is that a good idea? What about as a leader? In working with groups of leaders for twenty five years, I know this question will always create a variety of opinions, some pretty strongly held on both sides of the fence. Let’s unpack the question and give some clearer direction. But first we must define what a “friend” means.

One of the problems with the “friends at work” question is that different people view the term friend differently. Some see friend as equivalent to acquaintance, and others see it closer to confidant. If you view “friend” more broadly than you have no issues with saying you have friends at work. But some people who see the need for a line between work and personal matters sometimes are more cautious about saying they have friends at work.

Given those different perspectives, let’s replace the word friend with strong working relationships. Is it wise to have strong working relationships? Now the question is simpler, even when you consider the potentially more complicated relationship between leaders and team members. It is not only wise to have strong working relationships, but imperative for both the individual and the organization.

Here are views from both a personal and organizational standpoint:

Personal Prudence

Let’s make it simple. Think about the job you liked most and you were most successful at. Did you enjoy the people you worked with? Would you even say you had friends at work then? Odds are, based on the research, that your answer is a solid yes.

Over 60% of our social interaction takes place at work, when some of it is pleasant, it helps us be happier, less stressed, and more likely to want to remain in that working situation. In short you will be happier, healthier, and likely far more successful in your work when you have great working relationships.

Organizational Astuteness

Having healthier and happier employees should be reason enough for organizations to want strong working relationships. After all, when people feel better about their work, they are more likely to stay. In other words, strong working relationships will support retention. But there are many other reasons why organizations benefit when people feel that have friends at work. Here are four top reasons:

1. Better Communication. Every organization strives for greater communication. When relationships are stronger, communication is better.

2. Less Conflict. When humans are involved conflicts will arise. But when people have strong working relationships, they are far more likely to resolve that conflict sooner, with less drag on organizational results.

3. More Trust. Trust grows in large part in connection with the strength of relationships. And trust makes work easier and faster.

4. Higher Productivity. Add the mental health aspects of relationships with the other items on this list and you get greater individual and collective productivity – one of the most important measures of organizational health and success.

Humans are hardwired to form close connections with others and we are likely to form especially strong bonds with those we have something in common with. Inevitably, we are likely to find many of those people at work.

---

Making friends at work is easy, and mostly good for you and your organization.

---

Compartmentalizing your life into work and not-work is stressful and potentially unhealthy for you in the long term. By managing your friendships in a professional setting properly, you’ll have more fun at work, learn to relax a little, and begin to learn things about yourself and the organization you’re a part of. Doing so will pay dividends far beyond any complications it might occasionally cause.

*****